What year is this?
by Evildarkwolf
Summary: Gandalf cast a wrong spell sending himself and a few others to a new world. A white light was the last thing Thorin saw before he came to in a strange world. He was going to kill Gandalf as soon as he figured out where he was.
1. Cars?

_I'm going to give this story ago. Its a strange idea and its a little confusing at first. I like to have a strange story that is like no one else. Sorry its way long_

_I hope you all like a good mystery! It took me a while to make up my mind if I wanted to do this. It was a strange idea and I don't know if I can make it good. So bare with me please. Its a little boring at first (Almost put myself to sleep) and confusing but it will make sense by next chapter I promise. Hope you all like it because I dont. Enjoy! _

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Gandalf had been reading an old leather book that Radagast the brown had gifted him. He had told Gandalf that it would help him become an even better wizard. Bilbo shook his head in agreement he had not realized yet how good of a wizard Gandalf really was. Gandalf took the leather book from the brown bearded wizard with a thank you. He was grateful whenever he received a gift. He did not receive them that often and to get one at any point in time was wonderful in Gandalf's mind.

"Have you learned anything better yet?" Bilbo asked as he poked more tobacco in his pipe.

"It is a wonderful book. Most of the spells I already know. But I have found a few in which I will give a go as soon as we stop for the night." Gandalf found it was easy to ride while reading. But he looked up to see what Bilbo was doing. He liked the little hobbit but it seemed the feeling was not returned. "I will require your help with one of them." The wizard smiled knowing Bilbo would not willingly go along with a tryout spell.

"No thank you. I need to rest." Bilbo knew he would get talked into helping the wizard anyway. Gandalf had a way with making people bend to his will and help him out. It was the strangest thing too.

"That's quite alright. I know of two younglings that would be delighted to help!" Gandalf shouted in a happy voice as he looked back down at his book. "But I do believe you would love this one."

Bilbo was growing curious and figured it wouldn't hurt to ask. "What is it for?" He asked as he reached down to pet the pony he was riding.

"It's a spell to make you feel full of food." Gandalf said not looking away from his new book.

Bilbo thought about it and it did sound good but it sounded more like a spell for Bombur than himself. He felt something land on his shoulder and it was cold. He looked over at his shoulder and saw that a bird had dropped him a present. "Yuck!" He took out the handkerchief Bofur had given him a while back and tried his best to clean up the mess.

Soon Thorin yelled back at them to tell them that it was time to find a good place to stop. After they were all settled in and after Bifur started a fire they rolled out their bed rolls.

Gandalf stood near the fire his staff in one hand the leather book in the other. "Asha, Leire'sinn." He whispered into the fire.

Bilbo could see the fire dancing in the wizards eyes. And soon he found himself watching the fire too. It danced back and forth, it made crackling and popping sounds as smoke came up from the burning wood. Gandalf repeated what he said and the fire started to form something. it twirled and got taller. Soon it started to take the shape of a woman. He could just see the side of her face from where he sat.

"Why do you call upon me?" The fire shaped of a woman said in a deep voice.

It shook Bilbo's core as soon as he heard her speak. She must have been a fire spirit? Gandalf just looked at her but the fire was growing brighter and it was getting more difficult to keep his eyes on her. He could feel the heat on his face as the fire thing grew hotter. His eyes started to burn and water but Gandalf seemed to be unfazed by her. Bilbo looked around at all the dwarves but none of them seemed to see her. What few that were still awake acted as if nothing was happening. Thorin was sharpening his goblin cleaver and Balin was reading a book.

"I called you to ask you some questions. I know what you need." Gandalf finally said as he stood a little closer to her. "I know what you've been trying to do. It has to stop." Gandalf took a bow to the fire woman as his staff started to glow.

Bilbo's ears suddenly started to hum but then going quiet. Soon he started hearing the burning wood and low whispers from Gandalf to the sound of running water. He closed his eyes cupping his hands over his ears but the sounds got louder, it sounded like a waterfall or something. He could hear splashing and bubbles.

The noises suddenly stopped and he slowly opened his eyes. He looked up to where Gandalf stood but the wizard was no longer standing there. He looked around his eyes wide with fear. He was nowhere to be seen. "Gandalf?"

Thorin looked over at Bilbo noticing that he was looking around like he had lost something. "Something the matter hobbit?"

Bilbo jumped at the sound of Thorin's raspy voice. "What?"

"I asked if something was the matter." Thorin's eyes were hard to see through the night.

There was no moon in the sky and the few stars that there were didn't help put light to anything. "Where did Gandalf go off to?"

Thorin hadn't giving the wizard any thought since they had made camp. He looked around and sure enough the hobbit was right. The wizard didn't seem to be among them. "He left us." That seemed to be his first thought with everything.

"Could he be in the woods maybe?" Bilbo knew in his gut that Gandalf would never leave them. He was in this journey till the end.

"I care not where he went off too." Thorin was still mad at the wizard for making a suggestion that they make amends with the elves.

"But we must find him." Bilbo thought it was strange that one minute Gandalf was talking to fire the next he was gone. It felt like somthing was wrong but he didnt know what. Maybe somthing bad was going to happen? Maybe he should tell Thorin what he had seen? But then again on the other hand there was a chance that the king would not believe him.

"He will turn up before sunrise." He figured that maybe the wizard liked to sleep away from him and his men. Dwarves did have a bad habit of snoring loudly and he knew the hobbit didn't like it.

"You don't get it. He was here one minute then the next poof!" Bilbo stood up walking over to Thorin stepping over some of the dwarves that were asleep.

"What are you talking about?" Thorin looked up at the hobbit like he had gone mad.

"He was talking to the fire….it…well it got really big and turned into a…well I'm not sure." He thought back to what it had looked like. "I think it was a woman. She looked almost like an elf or somthing." Bilbo had the same look on his face as he did when he talked to the trolls a few days ago.

Thorin shook his head. "You expect me to believe that?" Thorin had never heard of anything like that.

"It's true! I swear on my mother."

"Your mother is dead. I think you were dreaming." Thorin was losing his patience with Bilbo. The young hobbit was starting to sound like his nephews with there strange tall tales. He was tired and grumpy and Bilbo's lies weren't helping him any. "Go to bed." Thorin laid down in his bed roll his back facing the hobbit.

"But…" Bilbo started but was caught off by a sharp voice.

"Now hobbit!" Thorin buried his head more in his rolled up blanket that he had made into a pillow.

Bilbo watched him feeling a little silly for telling Thorin. Maybe he was seeing things or maybe he was asleep? He looked over at Thorin's nephews who were asleep side by side a few feet away from their uncle. Bilbo went back over to his rolled out bed and laid down. He looked up at the stars thinking about where Gandalf could be. Soon the sound of crickets helped sleep find him but he awoke a little while later.. He tossed and turned all night not able to find a good spot that was not making his bones pain or his muscles go stiff.

Soon it was near morning and the sounds of shuffling disturbed him from his resting. Soon he heard a loud ping sound followed by a laugh and an ouch.

"You are one evil brother." The voice sounded like Fili.

"Well don't tell uncle or he will wring our necks." Bilbo knew without a doubt that the happy voice belonged to Kili.

"Will you two be quiet!" Bilbo shouted in frustration from the lack of sleep.

"Sorry." Came the reply of the two brothers.

Bilbo refused to believe that it was time to get up. He sat up looking around Fili and Kili were the only ones up at the moment. "Have either of you two seen Gandalf?"

The two looked at each other thinking. "Nope. Haven't seen him since yesterday." Fili said as he tossed Bilbo an apple. "Eat up."

"I'm not hungry." Bilbo placed the apple next to him standing himself up and stretching his arms out in front of him.

Soon high pitched screams filled the air causing the three of them that were awake to jump. "What was that?" Bilbo asked looking back at the brothers.

Thorin and the others awoke to the sound looking around. "Orcs!" Thorin screamed as he stood up grabbing his weapons. "Take arms!" Thorin's men all jumped up weapons in hand readying themselves for battle.

"This way! Quick!"

Everyone turned to look at who yelled. It was Gandalf. "Hurry!"

All the dwarves and one hobbit ran after the gray-headed wizard. Orcs not far behind them.

"Where are we going wizard!" Thorin yelled while looking back making sure all his men were with them.

"They will not cross these waters! They are magic."

They ran up a small hill and soon a large river came into view. "We can swim across. Hurry and jump."

Thorin watched as his men jump one by one into the water starting with Bilbo. Thorin, Fili, Kili and Gandalf were the last to jump into the water. The cold water took Thorin's breath away as soon as he hit the water. Most of his men had swam across the water. Just himself and his nephews plus the wizard were left. They were making way when suddenly a huge wave came up from the water making its way toward them.

Thorin's eyes went wide. "Swim faster!" Right now he hated Gandalf for suggesting they swim across the so called magic water. He would forever kick himself if Gandalf's plan got them killed. He did not want to drown or lose his kin. It seemed that no matter how hard he swam the shore got farther away.

* * *

Bilbo watched on as the dwarves around him yelled to their leader. Bilbo watched the water get closer and closer to Thorin and his nephews. But there was something odd about the way the water looked. It had a face and it looked a lot like the fire had. Same shape and everything but this time she was light blue. She seemed to look angry as she slashed down upon the dwarves and wizard.

"No." He whispered his ears started to go silent again. This time instead of water he heard a strange sound. It was a beeping or something he had never heard before. He could hear in the background the sounds of Thorin's men yelling. Things started to go bright and he closed his eyes. He could feel himself falling forward but something grabbed the back of his jacket and pulled him back.

* * *

Thorin reached out grabbing his youngest nephew pulling him close. He knew the wave was about to hit and he didn't know how long the river would go on and he didn't want to take the chance of losing him. He caught sight of his oldest nephew and almost had him in his grip when the wave hit. The air left his lungs as he and his nephew were swept away. He could feel Kili struggling against him but he held on to him for dear life. He wished he could tell him that everything will be alright.

He knew they both needed air and he only wished he could of had more time to grab Fili. He couldn't see all that much, the water seemed a little foggy. But he could see a blob of gray and knew it was Gandalf. But as he tried to reach out for him the wizard started to glow white. It got bigger and it engulfed him, he had to shut his eyes from the brightness. He started to feel strange like he was falling. He tried to open his eyes but it felt like something was holding them shut. His chest no longer felt like they needed air but it felt as if he didn't need it. His face felt like it was numb and the grip he had on Kili felt like it was getting lighter. He could still feel the cold water around him and hear it in his ears.

He felt himself begin to fall faster, he could still feel Kili's back against his chest he wrapped his other arm around him. He wanted to make sure he wouldn't lose him and he wished to be holding his oldest as well. All he could do was wish Fili would be alright.

Soon his back fell against something hard. The air left his body as he landed, the air he did not know he had left. It felt like a bucket of water had been splashed on him and a very big bucket at that. He opened his eyes closing them again and pulling his head to the side. Kili's wet hair was in his face and was getting into his mouth. He pushed his nephew off his chest and reopened his eyes. The first thing he saw was a strange object making its way toward him. It looked to be made of medal and his eyes went wide as he watched it close in on him. It made a screeching sound along with what sounded like a battle horn but different.

The big piece of medal stopped, a foot just shy of hitting his face. The strange piece was being held up by some strange looking round black stuff.

More squealing sounds filled the air as Thorin brushed his wet hair away from his face so he could see better. Thorin jumped up looking down at his nephew who still laid on the….what was that? It was not grass, nor was it marble. It was some strange black tar stuff. He helped his nephew up looking around. "Where are we?" The air smelled smoky and odd. It was stuffy too. He drew his sword swinging it around at the medal beast at the same time he looked around for Fili and the wizard.

Kili looked around not knowing what to say. He shivered as a small wind blew by. The water from his hair leaked down his face getting in his eye. There were strange things rushing by him and one almost hit him. It was like nothing he had ever seen before. And by the look on his uncles face he had also never seen such a thing. He looked to his right hearing more strange noises. He drew his bow shooting an arrow at a white medal beast that was coming his way. It ended up impaling itself in the front of it making a tearing medal sound. It made a sudden stop and its side opened and a human emerged from inside the beast.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?! You shot my car!" The human looked very mad as he stopped to look at the front of his 'car'. He ran his hand over the hood as white smoke floated from the grill he looked back at Kili. "I should beat you! Do you know how expensive this is?"

The human started to walk over to the smaller man but Thorin stepped in front of him. "Don't you dare touch him or I will cut you down."

The human looked down at him Thorin only stood just below the mans chest. "Cut me down? You act like you're in a play or something." He looked at what Thorin was wearing up and down. "You look like it too."

Thorin had no idea what the man was saying.

Kili heard another beeping sound. It was getting louder and he turned around to face it and saw a large yellow square thing coming his way. It looked nothing like the (car) he had just shot. It was much bigger and it was scary. He heard his uncle yell his name and tell him to move but he drew his sword ready for the beastly thing.

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_Hope you all like where this is going! Sorry for any confusion. I'm trying for a mystery, exciting story. This will take place in our year. just so you all know. Please review if you like it, that way I don't have to wonder if I should continue or not._

_Now should I run Kili over? Would anyone like to be in this story for a small part? You can pick what ever name you want to be. lol Throw ideas at me! _

_Can you imagine what they will think about how people dress now? lol Or cell phones? Thanks for reading!_


	2. police?

_Thank you all for the reviews and ideas. I hope you all like this one. Its shorter but better. Enjoy_

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The sound of screeching tires as the school bus came to a sudden stop but not before it collided with something. A whoosh sounded and a bearded heavy set man with a beer belly jumped out and came around the front. He glanced under the front and found a small kid lying under it. "No, I can't have run him over. I like kids!" He looked around at the growing crowd. "I didn't mean to. I would never…." He began to wring his hands and pace.

Thorin ran over, and leaned over looking under the bus. "Kili? Kili answer me!"

The driver bent down, removing his round greenish sunglasses. "I'm sorry boy, I didn't mean to hit your friend. Really. Call an ambulance!" He yelled, he thought that Thorin was just a kid as well. Kids began to file out and around them, some crying others just looking on in amazement.

Thorin got on his knees reaching out and touching Kili's head. "No…no. Kili? Wake up." He already didn't like where ever place this was.

A tall lean red-haired cop with a stern look on his face pushed his way through the crowd of kids. "What happened?"

"I hit a kid. He was in the middle of the road. I think that is his brother there." The bus driver pointed at Thorin who was halfway under the bus now.

Another cop, a female began to lead the kids to the sidewalk and out of the street. She didn't want the other kids to get hit. She looked at her fellow officer. He looked down as he talked into the mic on his shoulder, as he called for help. "Dispatch we have a code three. And send a code 10." The cop seemed to not be all that happy. That was all he needed, filling out reports, telling some family about their kid being hurt or worse dead. He had a date with the girl in records that he didn't want to miss.

The female cop got the children inside a fast food restaurant and ordered them all a juice. She put one of the older kids that she knew was good in charge and went outside. She moved back over to the other cop.

"Danny, can't you check him?" She nodded her head over to the kid who was being held by the other kid. She would check but she wouldn't be able to bear it if he was dead.

"Me? I'll get dirty." Danny complained. "You do it."

"Somebody help me get him out." Thorin was lying down with half his body under the bus, he was talking softly to Kili as he tried to get him out. Hidey lay down and slid under, she was shocked when she saw the face of the brother. A face with nice blue eyes, long haired and a the beginnings of a beard. He was not a kid. Hidey checked the kids neck and found a pulse. "He's alive!" She shouted out to her partner who was lazy.

"Dan! Give me a hand!" She looked at Thorin, put her hand on his arm. "You shouldn't try to move him until the paramedics get here."

"Who?" He did not know what a paramedic was nor was he going to leave his nephew laying under this….he didn't know what it was but Kili was not going to be under it for very much longer. "I can help him myself."

Just then he felt someone pull his legs and he found himself out and looking up at a two men in light blue, and a helmet on their heads. "Sir if you could let us in there. We can help him."

"Who are you?" He asked jumping to his feet, looking up at the men. He looked up at the strange helmets they had on their head. They were shaped like a bears head.

The kind female cop stood beside him. "It's alright, they will help him. That's what they do." Hidey put her hand back on his shoulder looking down at him. He stood about her shoulder and she thought for a small man he was quite cute.

"Healers?" Thorin asked her in a confused voice.

"Yes, they can do more than you or I can. Come over here. You can give me some information while we wait. Would you like some coffee?" She smiled down at him warmly.

"Coffee?" Thorin was taken back from that word. He cared not for coffee. He only cared for his hurt nephew right now. He watched as the two men with bear helmets pulled Kili free from under the yellow object.

He saw that Kili was beginning to wake up and he started to struggle with the two men. "Let me go!" Kili yelled but the two larger men held his arms by his side. One pulled out a long clear tube thing and pulled another plastic thing off the top. Once he did that Kili got a full view of the long sharp looking silver thing. "What is that?!" He began to struggle more kicking his legs out. "Uncle!"

"Don't touch him!" Thorin yelled as he ran to his nephew pulling his sword out. He came close to the one wilding the small sharp object but then he suddenly felt something strange. He felt it pierce his back and it hurt, it soon followed by a strange sensation that made his legs go wobbly. He fell to the hard ground jerking around like a fish out of water. Thorin heard Kili yell his name once more he tried to look up at him but his muscles were stiff and wouldn't move. His muscles felt like they were burning and he couldn't control his body jerking.

Kili watched as the woman who stood behind his uncle pull out a strange object from behind her. She aimed at Thorin and strange small lightning came out of the tip and a long silver rope thing shot out hitting his uncle in the back. "Uncle!" He yelled as Thorin fell to the ground jerking around the ground. He then felt a small prick in his arm like a mosquito bit. He looked back at the man who had the object. "Wha?" He tried to talk but his eyesight began to get blurry. He let his head fall back to the ground looking up at the sky. The clouds seemed to spin in a circle and soon he saw nothing.

Once Thorin could start to feel his body again he looked up at his nephew. But Kili seemed to be asleep again the two men lifting him up and placing him on a strange bed thing that was high above the ground. He tried to get up but someone dug their knee in the middle of his back. "Don't move! You're under arrest!" Thorin knew the voice to be Danny.

"Get off of me!" Thorin was wishing right now that Gandalf was here so he could get them out of this mess since he was the one who got them into it. He then thought of Fili. Where was he? He had almost forgotten about him after Kili's new incident.

"Be nice to him Danny!" Hidey said pulling Danny away from Thorin. "You're being too rough." He pulled Thorin who was now in handcuffs to his feet. "We have to take you in for an attempt to assault with a deadly weapon."

"What?" Thorin was getting sick of hearing these strange words.

"Sorry I had to taser you." Hidey felt horrible having to taser the poor man but she couldn't take the chance of him harming one of the paramedics.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO

Fili could feel the heat from the sun on his face and the cool grass underneath him. It felt so good, it had been a while since he got to enjoy the nice weather. "Doesn't this feel great?" Fili asked his brother waiting for a reply. "Kili?" He opened his eyes looking to his left but his brother wasn't there. He looked to his right but instead of it being Kili it was Gandalf who lay there. His hair was a mess like he had been hit by lighting.

Fili sat up looking around at the tall trees. This was not where he was last. He saw humans running around on the bright green grass chasing each other. Some were his size some were smaller. When did they stop at a human village? He looked back at Gandalf confused. "Gandalf." He hoped that the wizard would wake up soon. He had to know where they were since he seemed to know everything. And he wanted to know what happened to his brother…and Thorin along with the other dwarfs.

"Excuse me!" Some strange woman jogged past him. "You're not supposed to sleep in this park!" She yelled back at him as she hurried off.

"Park?" Fili watched her run she was wearing hardly anything at all. It was a strange sight to see. She wore tight short pants and just a cloth over her chest exposing her belly and most of her legs. "Strange girl."

He got up and walked over to Gandalf kicking his foot against the wizards thigh. "Wake up. Something is seriously wrong here."

Gandalf began to stir peaking one eye open. "Fili?"

"Yes? Let me help you." Fili grabbed Gandalf's arm and helped him stand. Once Gandalf was standing on his own Fili bent down picking up the staff and handing it to its owner. "Where are we? I can't seem to remember. Did I have ale last night?"

Gandalf looked around shaking his head. "I do believe I did the wrong spell."

"You did what?" Fili looked up at the gray wizard knowing that whatever he was talking about was bad.

"I tried to send us to safety before the wave could take us over the fall." Gandalf looked around at all the people who were running around.

"Where did you take us?"

"I'm not sure yet. But I will find out." Gandalf started to walk over to some older man who was sitting on a bench. He was reading a thin shinny book that read (Fantasy&Science fiction) and the man seemed happy with it. "Excuse me sir."

"Yes?" The older man looked up from his thin book smiling.

"Could you tell me where I am?"

"You got Alzheimers or something?" The older man asked.

Gandalf had no idea what Alzheimers were but if it helped him get his question answered then he shall grow Alzheimers. "Yes."

"Poor fellow. And you can't be but my age or a few years older. We are in Los Angeles ." The man really did feel sorry for the older man with the long beard. He probably had the long beard cause he either keeps forgetting to shave or he forgot where he put his razor. He shook his head in pity.

"What is the year?"

"You can't be serious." The man was shocked at that question. Yeap he had definitely forgot where he put his razor. He probably even forgets to go buy one. And when he gets to the store he forgets what he came for. "The year is 2012."

"Thank you so much." Gandalf turned walking back to Fili. "The year seems to be 2012."

"We're in big trouble. Do you know where you sent Kili?" Fili said thinking about how far ahead they were from his time.

"I know not of where anyone is."

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The other names ya'll picked will be in the next chapter to do something cool. And just so ya'll know the book will exist but its not popular so not that many people will know about it.

_I could not help myself I had to taser poor Thorin...well I didnt but Hidey sure did. :P Thanks for reading. Hope it was good. You will all get a kick out of the next one._


	3. Size human

_Thanks for the reviews for the last chapter! This one has a little humor. But its not that good. Its a little rushed. Enjoy_

* * *

Thorin watched the two men wheel his nephew away from him and into a white box. Once Kili was inside the doors closed and the box road off.

"Where are they taking him!" Thorin asked Hidey who had him by his arm.

"To the hospital. He will be fine." Hidey assured him.

"Take me to him! Now!" Thorin demanded.

"You will not be seeing him for a long while short stuff!" Danny had walked over to his partner and Thorin looking down at him. "I can take him Hidey."

"No…he's mine. I will take him." Hidey gave her partner a snarl as she led Thorin to her cruiser. "Sorry, Danny can be a bit of a jerk at times."

"What is that?" Thorin said when he took in the look of the strange thing the woman was leading him to. He looked around but something was dead wrong, something was missing. "Where are the horse's?"

"I don't know. Are you a horse fan?" She didn't get what he really meant. She opened the car door waiting for him to get in.

Thorin just looked inside not bothering to get in. "I'm not getting in that thing. I demand a horse!" Thorin yelled looking around.

The strangers who stood around just looked at him some even laughed.

Hidey rolled her eyes at the smaller man. "This is not a game sir. You could be in a lot of trouble. You had a sharp sword in your possession. Now please take a seat. You're holding up traffic. This bridge needs to keep moving or it gets cluttered fast."

Thorin shook his head he had no idea what she was talking about but he was starting to get used to it.. "Could I get my hands untied?"

Hidey looked down at him. "I can't do that." She felt he was a good person though. She felt he would not harm her and she knew from practice that handcuffs were not the greatest feeling things in the world. "I guess I could cuff you to the side of the door." She smiled pulling out her key and stepping behind Thorin. She unlocked his right hand. "Ok. Now will you take a seat please?"

Thorin nodded bowing his head but instead of sliding in the car seat he turned around and took off.

"Hey!" Hidey yelled taking chase.

"You would think that with him being a midget that he would run slow...but nooo." She said as she ran a little faster.

"Don't make me taser you again!" She reached behind her grabbing her taser gun but when she looked up again Thorin was not there. "What? Where'd he go?" She looked around not seeing him. But then it dawned on her. "O God!"

She ran over to the side of the bridge looking over it. And sure enough she was right the smaller man had jumped over. He was swimming toward land. She ran back to her cruiser starting it. She tried to drive but that stupid bus was still in hear way. She honked her horn but then she remembed that it was a crime scene and no one was in the bus. "Shit!" She didn't want to have to tell her boss the mistake she had made.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Thorin pulled himself up the wet grassy bank. He was getting tired of water. He got to his feet his legs a little wobbly. He looked around this place sure was green. There were loads of people walking around and some were walking strange wolf type of things on ropes. Thorin thought the white fluffy small one this older woman was walking was the one of the ugliest thing he had ever seen.

He looked past her seeing a familiar face. "Gandalf!" He took off in a run passing the people who were walking and bumping into a few who would not move. He stopped just shy of reaching the older wizard. And when the gray haired man turned around it was not Gandalf. "Sorry." Thorin said as he walked by the gray haired man.

"Thorin!"

Someone had yelled his name and he knew that voice. He turned around a smile forming on his lips. "Fili!" His nephew ran at him throwing himself at Thorin giving him a hug.

"I was beginning to think I was never going to see you again." Fili pulled back looking at his uncle. But someone was missing. "Where's Kili?" Worry was filling his gut. Maybe he's back with the others?

"Some strange men took him away in a white box."

"What! Who?" Fili looked around expecting the men to be somewhere close. "We need to get him back!"

"Don't you think I know that!" Thorin yelled, this place was beginning to make him grumpy.

"Why did you let them take him away?" Fili wondered as he stepped back away from his uncle.

"I didn't. I tried to stop them but I was over powered." He wanted to tell Fili what had happened but he wasn't exactly sure. "I think it was witchcraft or something?"

"Witchcraft?" Fili had no idea what Thorin was talking about. "Someone cast a spell on you?"

"Maybe. I was brought down by some strange light thing that paralyzed me."

Fili shook his head, in the little bit of time he was here he already didn't want to stay. "And you're ok?"

"Right now I am." Thorin smiled he was touched that his nephew cared so much for him.

"There you are Thorin." Gandalf suddenly appeared there. "I found a map." He looked around for Kili. "Where is the young one?" He knew Kili ended up in this world along with them, he could feel it. He just couldn't figure out how they all got separated.

"Someone took him." Thorin was starting to feel guilty that Kili was who knows where.

"I can find him with this." Gandalf waved his hand over the map and whispered a spell.

"You sure you should be doing that? The last time you cast a spell look what you did." Thorin became uneasy of the wizard. He no longer trusted him to cast a spell right.

The map started to glow a black line made its way in odd angles in the middle of the map. "I guess we follow that." Gandalf said looking up with a smile on his face. "But one last thing." He lifted his staff up and gave Fili and Thorin a tap on their heads. "Ave!"

Thorin closed his eyes. "Don't ever hit me again!" He rubbed his head he just wanted to punch the wizard. When he opened his eyes he was face to face with Gandalf but he could see the top of his head. "What did you do?" He looked over at his nephew and he too was now as tall as the wizard. He was just slightly shorter maybe about Gandalfs hight.

"I made you the size of a human so you could blend in better." Gandalf smiled at them he was pleased with himself it was a job well done. "Maybe we could cut your hair off too?" Gandalf suggested.

"No!" Thorin and Fili yelled simultaneously. Thorin grabbed the ends of his hair maybe Gandalf was right. But he didn't want to go home with no hair. He would no longer have pride.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Kili opened his eyes feeling sick. The room seemed to spin and his head felt foggy. 'Where am I?' He thought as he started to looked around. The room seemed to spin less and less. He reached up to rub his head. There was a beeping sound in the back ground and he looked to where he thought the sound was coming from. There was a strange floating box with strange lines and letters on it. He reached up to touch it but then he noticed he had a white bandage wrapped around his arm. And there was a clear tube coming from under the bandage. His eyes followed the tube up to the bag it was connected to.

He reached over to take the bandage off his arm but then he saw some strange thing on his finger. "What is this stuff?" He pulled the small white thing off his finger and suddenly the slow beeping sound started to make a loud straight beep. He looked up at the box and it was flashing red in the corner. He looked down at himself and his armor and jacket were gone. He was now in some strange off blue robe. And the room was really cold.

Some brown headed woman ran in the room looking at him. "What are you doing?" She asked.

Kili looked at what she had on. She was wearing strange blue gown thing. "Who are you?"

"I am Alice and I am your nurse." She had medium brown hair with red streaks.

It was a strange color for hair. He wondered if it was this worlds way of turning gray? She was young but maybe they didn't live that long? "What's a nurse?"

Alice smiled at him. "Cute." Her grey blue eyes shined as she walked over to the box that was beeping. She poked at the screen making the noise stop. She grabbed the white object and pinched the end. It opened into two pieces. "Let's put this back on your finger. You're lucky you know. You were hit by a bus but it stopped enough to when it hit you it didn't cause any real damage. When you fell back you smacked your head on the ground. You have a nasty not." Alice figured he might want to know what happened to him.

She grabbed his hand placing the thing back on his right pointer finger. "Try not to take it off this time." She looked at him for a moment studying him. "You look hungry. Would you like some pudding, a sandwich, doughnut, coffee?" She knew the hospital food sucked but it wouldn't hurt to ask.

"What are those?" Kili had never heard of any of that stuff before.

"You must have really given yourself a bad knock on the head. I was asking if you were hungry. I will get you some if you are."

"Yes, I am a bit. Do you have any honey cake?"

She smiled at him, she did not know about any honey cake but she would find something yummy for him. She touched the back of his hand. "I'll be right back." She hurried out the door, as it silently, slowly closed behind her. He looked around the room, at the white walls, floors and even the bed they all had white covers. It wasn't a soft bed either. He suddenly felt the need to water a tree. But where would he do that? He swung his legs over the bed and stood up. He started to walk towards the door but his arm was pulled back by the pole that held the water bag. He unwrapped the bandage and looked at the tube in his arm.

He had never seen anything like that before. He grabbed the tube and pulled it out of his arm. "Ow!" He hissed as he pulled it free. Blood leaked from where it was. He cupped his hand over it and walked out the hall. He needed to find a way out of this place. He was surprised Thorin was not by his side when he woke, he began to wonder where his uncle was. He hoped he was ok. His back felt a little airy but he gave it no thought of it as he went on his mission.

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_Hehe. I could not help myself. And I had to let Thorin get away. :) I didn't wanna put him in jail. Hope you all liked it! I don't know where this story will go but its ending up longer than I thought it would be. Hoped you all liked it. **Please review. Next chapter will be funnier. and better I promise.**_


	4. Fake tree?

_Thank you all for the nice reviews! I love them. This one is way better than the last! And funny. _

**_Warning this chapter contains a bare butt!_**

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Thorin snapped the map from Gandalf's grip. "Let's get a move on."

Gandalf watched the now tall dwarf turn his back away from him. At least the spell worked on their cloths too as the cloths grew with them, Gandalf thought as he started to walk behind the two. Fili was reaching up to touch every high tree branch he could see. He seemed to be happy that he was taller but then he thought of something. "Thorin. I do believe we are going the wrong way."

"Do not tell me I am wrong. The map clearly says to go this way." Thorin pointed out where he thought they were on the map. But the map had changed direction. "What's wrong with this stupid map?"

"If we go the wrong way it changes so we will go the right way." Gandalf babbled on.

"Mommy, mommy look!" A little girl started tug on her mother's dress pointing at the two strange men.

The mother looked over at them smiling. "Nice outfits. Is there a medevil festival today?" She loved festival's!

"Pardon me?" Thorin asked the woman looking down at her, she was short.

"Your outfits. They look so real. Where did you buy them?" She reached up to touch Thorin's hair. "Is that a wig too?" She gave it a tug but let go when he hissed. "O my. I am so sorry. It looked like part of your costume."

"Please miss. I have no idea what you are talking about. Be on your way." Thorin was getting tired of the obstacle courses that seemed to get in his way. He needed to find Kili.

"Wow. You take your part to heart. See Laverne, that is what you need to learn when you get older. And remember not to point. Its impolite." She nodded at Thorin. "You have a great day sir." And with that she was on her way.

"I think you two should hide your weapons." Gandalf said as he started to walk again.

"I don't have but my knife." Thorin's was gone and he didn't know where the humans had taken it to.

Once they were at the open streets they looked around. The buildings were tall and everything was colorful. Cars speed by the busy road as the lights changed from green to red.

Fili watched as a young lady started to walk his way. She was smiling at him and she ran her hand across his chin while she walked by. "Hey sexy." She winked as she turned back around.

She walked strangely as she was shaking her butt back in forth. The skirt she wore was so short that if she were to bend over she would show her unders.

Fili stood there smiling at her. "I think she likes me." He looked at his uncle. "What is a sexy?"

Thorin shook his head. "I have no idea but I don't like the way she dresses, I wonder if her mother knows?" Thorin had never seen a dwarf nor human ever dress in such a thing before. Was this what they will dress like later in life? Why weren't they wearing armor?

Gandalf smiled. "Let's take a bus." Gandalf did a spell on himself to give himself some knowledge of today's world. But he had to admit it wasn't working all that great.

"What is a bus? I've heard of that name before." Thorin said watching as Gandalf walked over and stood in front of a pole.

"You will see soon enough. Here it comes."

Thorin turned to see the bus slowing down to stop where they were. "That's the thing that hit Kili!"

"What?!" Fili yelled drawing his sword.

"Put that away you idiot!" Gandalf yelled smacking Fili in the leg with his staff. "Are you trying to get us all in to trouble?"

"He's right." Thorin said putting a hand on Fili's shoulder. "I got mine taken away when I tried to save Kili."

The bus' doors opened up and Gandalf took a step in. "Coming?"

Gandalf led the other two onto the bus. They moved up the steps and Gandalf fed some bills into the machine by the driver. He had swiped the green paper off of some man who walked by him in the park. He was given three transfers. Gandalf found a couple free seats and took one. Thorin sat down sideways next to a young woman, with black hair and big brown eyes. She was wearing a red dress, and high heeled shoes and she was talking to another young woman with brown hair her eyes two different colors. That young woman was talking and waving her hands as she talked and she almost hit Thorin. Thorin ignored them and looked out the window.

Fili sat down next to a tall slender young man with puppy dog eyes. He sat there turned and saw Fili and started staring at him. It made Fili uneasy. He tried to ignore the man but he could still feel his eyes on him.

Gandalf sat next to an older man with a long white beard. It reminded him of Balin only older. "Good afternoon sir." Gandalf said, it wouldn't hurt to have a small conversation with an old fellow.

"Morning." The older man took in Gandalf's looks. "Nice beard."

"Thank you. Yours seemed to be a good one too." Gandalf shook his head. The bus stopped and two small children stepped on. They were laughing as they came down the aisle. They sat down across from the old wizard. They had candy in their hands and one was popping them in his mouth one by one.

He wanted to see how many he could stuff inside his mouth. "I'm going to win!" The dark haired boy said.

"I bet you can't Frank." Replied the blond haired kid.

"Can too Dennis!" Frank popped two more in his mouth and he kept going until his cheeks were proofed out as far as they would go. The bus suddenly hit a pothole and down half the candy went in Franks throat. He coughed and coughed not being able to dislodge them but Dennis gave him a hard punch to his back. Candy flew out of his mouth towards the two older folks. Frank looked up. "Sorry."

"That's quite alright young one." Gandalf looked back at the other old man smiling. "So how do you get this bus to stop?" He asked but the older man pointed a finger at Gandalf's beard. Gandalf looked down and saw a bright red piece of candy stuck to the end of his beard. "Will you look at that." He said as he picked up the end of his beard and popped it into his mouth. He would suck on the end of his beard until the candy came undone. "Ummm.." He moaned, he had never had a piece of candy before and it was so sweet and the taste was like nothing he had ever had.

"You know it's not like when we were kids. There are strange diseases going around now a days." The old man's speech fell on deaf ears as Gandalf just looked ahead moaning as he enjoyed his new treat.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Kili walked down the cold hall, where there were bright lights against green walls. The floors were icy cold on his bare feet. He had to find a place to go, and soon. He saw humans moving wearing greens, blues, yellows, browns, and even pink, carrying trays with bottles, or pushing people around chairs with big wagon wheels on them. He heard a moan and saw a man lying on a table with wheels. There was blood on his arm and face. It looked like he had been in a battle.

He turned a corner and it looked the same as the last one. "Em…honey you are yummy hot!" He heard shortly after he felt a sharp slap against his bare backside. He turned and saw a woman sitting in a chair, smiling at him. "Nice butt."

"Keep your hands to yourself!" He was outraged that this human dared to grab him. He reached behind him and noticed that there was a big gap back there. His cheeks flushed red as he held the gown he was wearing closed in the back.

"But I like em short! I love how your cheeks turn all red like that." She reached for him again grabbing the front of his gown. "You sure are hot for a short one."

"I feel fine thank you." The only time he was ever called hot was when he was sick and running a fever.

"I bet you do! I'm feeling a little hot right now. And I feel fine now too! Must be fate!" She ran her long skinny finger across his collar bone. "I don't care that youre short..." She started to run her finger down the middle of his chest. "As long as you're well-built where it counts." Her finger kept tracing down his chest going down his stomach as she smiled with glee. "I havent had any in a long while." Her hand creeping lower.

"Woh!" Kili yelled smacking her hand away. "What are you doing?" He backed away from her his eyes wide with new fear. This woman was scary!

He turned around running away from her his gown flapping around him as he heard her calling. "Come back here ya hotty!"

"No running in the halls. You could hurt someone." Kili stopped just shy of running into a short young woman with a freckled face and silver hair. He stopped.

"I am looking for a tree. I have to go, badly." He was hopping on the tips of his toes.

She looked at him, and realized what his problem was. "There is a men's room, right there."

"A what?"

"You know…a place to empty your hose." She blushed.

He nodded going to the door she was pointing at. He rushed in the door, not sure if it was right and looked around. He saw another man in there, he was washing his hands.

He went over to the sinks following the other man's example. He put his hand under the faucet and water flowed. He liked that, and smiled. It was just like magic. He took his hand away and it soon stopped. He did it again and again getting a glare from the man who was next to him. He then he went over to the box on the wall, and again put his hand under it…strange thin brown towels came out…and began to pile on the floor. Amazing he thought. He went back out the door leaving a mess as he laughed. This was more fun that what he was use too. But then he remembered he still needed to go and he returned to the mens room.

He looked around not knowing what to do. There was no tree...oh wait there was one there in the corner. He jogged over to it but before he went he touched the strange looking small tree. It felt unreal. But he had to go maybe it was deprived of water? He did his business smiling with relief he left the room.

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_Poor Kili...and Gandalf is sick! Next one will hopefully be just as good. And I'm going to try and get poor Kili out of that strange hospital. And more of the names you gave me will be :D_


	5. cast

_Thank you all for the review! Enjoy_

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The bus slowed down and a young woman walked on. After paying he looked around the bus. She wore glasses and a long jacket that stopped about her knees. He hair was a nice mahogany color and the red shinned in her hair as the light landed on it.

She smiled as she walked down the bus and took a seat next to Thorin who was moving his head away from the black haired girl who was waving her hands around. He looked like he was trying to keep from getting smacked by the strange girl.

The young girl looked at the old man with a long gray beard and a strange pointed gray hat. He reminded her of someone. She smiled shaking her head. She reached in her black bag that hung over her shoulder and across her chest. She pulled out a book and started to read it.

"Are we anywhere close by?" Thorin asked looking at Gandalf who sat across from him.

"We will get there when we get there." Gandalf smiled at the dark haired man.

Thorin looked over at the young girl who was sitting next to him. He didn't remember her being there before. He looked down at the book she was reading, he tried to read it but the words were too small.

She looked up from her book. "Hi!" She said in a cheerful voice.

Thorin was taken aback by her sudden sound. "Hi." He said back in a weary voice.

"I'm Willow…But you can call me Will." She stuck her hand out to him.

Thorin shook her hand nodding. Why wasn't she bowing? He wondered as he looked her up and down. She had on baggy jeans they were too long and dragged.

"What's your name?" She seemed nice and cheerful and she was smiling brightly at Thorin.

"Thorin."

Her face changed as she made a O with her lips. "I know that name!" Her smile returned and her brown eyes sparkled. "You parents must have like The Hobbit."

"Excuse me?"

She giggled grabbing the book that rested in her lap and waved it at him. "This one. Have you ever read it?"

Thorin took the book from her long fingers and looked at the front. "The Hobbit?" He opened the book about the middle of it and started to read a little of it. "Spiders?"

"Keep it." Will said as she reached in her bag pulling out a pencil. She pulled her hair back in a small bun putting the pencil through it. "I've got another copy at home."

Thorin looked up at her. "Where did this come from?" He asked closing the book. His name along with a few of his men's names were on that page he looked at.

"The book store. So…Where you headed to?"

"I think it's called a hospital?" He said looking over at Gandalf. "He's leading the way."

"Family member?" He smiled faded as she looked at him with worry.

Thorin looked at her confused. "I don't know what you mean."

"Is someone in your family hurt or sick? Maybe a friend?"

"My nephew is there…I hope." He said looking up at a 'ding' sound. The bus slowed down the doors opening and the old man that sat next to Gandalf got off.

"Do you need help getting there?"

"I think I can figure it out thank you."

"Good luck!" She smiled at him reaching in her bag pulling out her cell phone and started to play with it.

Thorin looked down at it wondering what it was. The box looking thing had a bright screen on it and stuff was moving around in it. And as Will dragged her long pointy finger across the screen it seemed changed. "What is that?" Thorin thought that maybe this strange box was witchcraft too. This world seemed to use a lot of it.

"This?" Will held up her dark blue phone. "It's my phone." She giggled as she watched his face. She liked this man, he seemed to be clueless but in a good way. "Do you wanna look at it?" She placed her phone in Thorin's hand.

Thorin looked down at the strange glowing object. He placed the end of his finger on it but nothing happened. He tried again this time he moved his finger down and the picture that was there changed. "Strange." He said giving it back to her. "I don't like it."

"How can you not like it?" She wondered looking down at her phone. "You can read on it, surf the net."

"What's the net?" Thorin thought that maybe it was something to catch someone in.

"Internet." Will told him as she went on about when it was created and all the stuff it held.

Fili watched the young man next to him pull on the long silver cord that was above the window. As he pulled it, it made a 'ding' sound and the front of the bus blinked. The sign that was blinking read stop. "What's that for?" Fili asked the brown haired man.

The young man just looked at Fili. "What do you mean?" His doe eyes looked sad as he followed Fili's eyesight. "Oh that thing. It's to let the bus driver know that at the next stop you want to get off."

Fili reached over and pulled on the silver cord. He smiled once it made the familiar ding noise again. "Wow." He pulled on it twice more before he heard a shout.

"I get it! Now knock it off!" The man who was driving yelled back not knowing who it was.

"He is rude." Fili said as the bus came to a stop and Fili had to get up to let the young man out of his seat. "Good day to you." Fili said bowing his head to the man.

"You too bro." He replied getting off the bus.

Fili took his seat again this time sitting closer to the window. He looked up at the silver cord it was just so tempting to give it a little tug. He had never seen anything like it before. But then again the only thing that look familiar to him in this strange world is the trees and grass. His temptation got to him and he pulled on the cord and again it made a ding sound.

He giggled as the bus stopped and the doors opened. The bus driver looked around. "No one? Alright then."

The bus once again took off and Fili looked up at the cord. His hand slowly made its way up the window until it reached the cord. He gave it a sharp pull ducking in his seat shortly after so the driver couldn't see him. He giggled as he looked to his right at some woman who was looking at him with a shameful look.

As the bus stopped again the bus driver looked back. "Whoever that is will you knock it off! You're wasting time."

The woman who was looking at Fili raised her hand in the air. Once she got the bus driver attention her hand formed a fist her pointer finger sticking out and it was pointing right in Fili's direction. Fili shook his head at her. "He did it." She announced not caring what the boy wanted.

Fili slowly sat up in his seat. "Sorry." He yelled at the bus driver. He could see Thorin giving him the stink eye from where he sat.

The bus driver took off his seatbelt and stood up looking back at Fili. "Get off my bus!" He yelled.

"What?" Fili didn't understand why the guy wanted him to get off. "I haven't gotten where I'm supposed to be yet."

"I don't care! I'm tired of your games!" The man yelled again. "Now get off my bus." The man pointed to the door next to him.

Fili stood up looking ashamed. Thorin and Gandalf looked up at him. They too got up and all three of them got off the bus.

"Now what are we going to do!" Thorin yelled looking down at Fili. "What were you thinking?!"

"Calm down Thorin he's just a youngling. He's curious."

"Yea well lead the way wizard."

"Wizard?"

They turned to the sound seeing Will standing there as the bus behind her took off.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Kili was walking around the hall once again smiling as he stopped in front of a big box with clear glass. Behind the glass were packets of what Kili assumed was food. He shook his head wishing he knew how to get the food out cause he sure was hungry.

He something moving around behind him and he turned. There on a bed was a strange stiff white thing. He walked over to it but the bed was too high and he couldn't see above it to see what the white thing was. There seemed to be fingers poking out of the long end of it. He reached up to touch it but just as his fingers brushed against it the fingers started to wiggle. "Hello?" A voice called out from above. "Who goes there."

Kili didn't know if he should stay silent or not. "Hello?"

"Is this my angel come to claim me?"

Kili had no idea what that meant but he took the chance. "Yes?"

"I... my God! Please don't take me yet! I need more time!"

The fingers were now moving back in forth in a struggle. Kili knocked on the white stuff with his knuckle and it sounded hollow. It was some strange hard substance. Kili looked around and his eyes rested on a black chair. He went over to grab it and he dragged it over to the high bed. He climbed on top of it and looked down at the…person?

He didn't know what he was looking at. There was a small hole cut in a circle and a face could be seen. "Are you real?" He poked the hard white stone?

The woman opened her eyes. "O thank God! Doctor please help me. My angel was just talking to me a moment ago. I think I'm dying." Her eyes were a bright green and one of her eyes seemed to be dark around it like a raccoon.

"I'm not a doctor." Was Kili's response.

"Oh." She looked disappointed. "Then what are you?"

"I'm a dwarf." Kili said with pride.

"Oh…You don't look short." The girl wished she could move her body.

"I'm standing on a chair." Kili smiled looking down at the ground. He wished he was this tall. It would be cool. "What's wrong with you?"

"I had an accident. I was sky diving and the doctor said I broke most of my bones and that I'm lucky. Lucky! Yea I bet, I don't like not being able to move." She blabbed on. "Who are you?"

"My name is Kili."

"Your parents gave you a strange name. I'm Missy. I would shake your hand but I cant. But it's nice to meet you." She gave him a small smile.

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_Hope I did Willow justice. :D_


	6. Finding the lost boy

**Whoot! I'm back! And not in black! Sorry for the long wait everyone. I didn't know where to go with this, but I'm back in the groove. I really hope none of you lost your interest in this story. **

**This one is a little rushed sorry. Its leading up to the next very good one.**

**And thank you all very much for your reviews! Hope I still have everyone in character**

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Once Will lead the three men to the hospital they rode the elevator up to the second floor. Thorin took off to the left right as the doors had opened almost knocking an older man off his feet, Fili following close behind his heals.

They walked until they heard someone familiar shouting. "Get off me!"

"Shut up midget!" Someone else shouted their voice unknown to either of the two dwarfs, the shout was followed by a popping sound and a pained cry.

Thorin came around the corner to see two human teenagers, one was holding Kili in the air by the back of his hospital robe. The other one was holding a bright yellow paged book swinging it and hitting Kili in the chest. Anger rushed thought Thorin's veins as he started walking toward the three of them. "Hey!"

His voice was hard as he yelled making the boys jump, the one dropped Kili to the ground looking right at Thorin. "You dare touch my Kin?" Thorin asked fire burning in his eyes as a low growl escaped his mouth. He reached to his side for his sword but his hand was met with only air, he had forgotten that the cops had taken his goblin cleaver from him.

Fili ran past Thorin with a battle cry but the two teenagers took off down the empty hall. Fili wondered why this was the only hall that seemed to be empty. "Get back here!"

"Fili!"

Fili stopped running after the two idiots once he heard his brother yell for him. He turned around looking at his small short brother, and he started to laugh.

Kili looked up at his way tall brother. "How did you get to be Human sized?" But Fili's only answer to him was more laughing. "What are you laughing at?"

"You're so cute little brother." The little part dragged out as he said it. Fili reached down picking up his midget brother under the arms and holding him in front of him. "Look at you."

Thorin came up behind Fili. "Put your brother down Fili."

Fili did as he was told getting a death look from his brother.

"Are you alright Kili?" Thorin asked worried if the teenagers had hurt him. As he looked down at the much smaller Kili it reminded him of when Kili was four and how he stood at his knee just as he did right now. He just wanted to pick Kili up and give him a hug like he had when he was younger. If it wasn't for Kili's light scruff on his face he would be the same four year old he once was. Seeing Kili like that made him miss those days.

"I'm fine." Kili looked down at his bare feet in shame. The two teenagers reminded him of when he was younger and how he had a group of older kids who liked to pick on him. They always called him names and beat him up just because he was smaller than others his age. But once Fili found out about where his bruises were coming from he had a fight with them and they never again called him a name or tried to hurt him.

Gandalf finely walked around the corner smiling. "Kili!" He said cheerfully stopping just in front of the younger dwarf. "You should go change too so I can make you like us….Unless you prefer to be tiny?" He asked his face not wavering.

Fili giggled watching the look on his brothers face. "He wants to stay tiny. He likes to be babied."

Kili's cheeks turned pink as his brothers comment got his uncle and the wizard laughing. He wanted to hit his brother but instead he turned around headed for his room that had his clothes in it.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Will thought she had seen one of her good friends in the corner and went over to make sure she was right. Her heart was pounding in her chest when she saw her best friend putting money in the vending machine. She hadn't seen her in a little over a month since she had move away. "Rebecca!"

Rebecca turned around her face lighting up. "Willy!" Rebecca ran at her long lost friend giggling. "It's been forever!" She embraced Will in a tight hug.

"What are you doing in town?" Will asked pulling away giggling.

"Came to town to come see you. I wanted it to be a surprise but now it can't be ya party pooper." Rebecca said smiling as she turned back around pushing two buttons on the machine. "So hungry."

"Why are you at the hospital? You get hurt?" Will asked.

Rebecca picked up her right foot and waved it at Will. "I broke my toe."

Will was about to comment but her three new friends came up to her with one more in toe.

"You must be Kili." Will said out stretching her hand. "I'm Will."

Kili took her hand giving it a shake as he looked around everything looking a lot different now that he was so tall.

"Guys I'd like you to meet my best friend Rebecca!" Will said smiling exactly.

"Do you guys like to party?" Rebecca asked smiling at Kili who was taller than herself.

"Sure we do!" Kili said thinking back to when him and Fili threw a party for Thorin's birthday.

"Sweet! Well come on then!"

Will rolled her eyes at her crazy friend, she herself wasn't much of a partier but whenever she hung out with Rebecca there was never a dull moment.

They all followed Rebecca to a big building that had different colored lights coming out of the window.

Thorin took a step back. "Magic?" He had never seen a building glow like that and with it being night time it shined so brightly.

The two brothers looked on with wide eyes, mouths opened wide.

Once Rebecca got the big guard that was in front of the door to say it was ok for them to go inside she smiled back at her old and four new friends. "Let's go!" Rebecca looked so excited as she skipped into the large place.

Fili and Kili were the next ones to go inside followed by Will. Thorin watched his two nephews go inside and shook his head. He didn't want to go into the building but he knew he couldn't let his nephews roam by themselves. They had a habit of getting into trouble and he knew he should go keep an eye on them.

Gandalf walked up behind Thorin patting him on the back. "It seems like a party made just for me."

Thorin could see the colored lights shining in the wizards eyes. "You would think that."

Gandalf walked into the building the top of the door knocking his tall pointy hat off his head. He turned around picking it up off the ground. He brushed the dirt off the his gray hat and turned around looking up at the ceiling.

Strange silver balls hung from the ceiling along with different colored lights that waved back and forth and some in circles. Gandalf was impressed at what the humans had made and wanted to take some of this stuff home with him. And no matter how much Thorin thought that they were struck Gandalf knew he would get them back home. But in the meantime he would enjoy this new experience.

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**I hope you liked Rebecca and I hope I got her right haha. The next chapter will be so awesome! I'm so in love with it. There will be a hooker type girl, and some boys will be getting hit on and someone will dance like a crazy person. lol _So please review_ and the next one will be up tomorrow. And I hope your excited!**


	7. let the fun begain

**So happy you all still like this! Thank you all for the reviews! :D Made my day. This one will only have our lovely dwarfs in it and some random girls I put in for some laughs. Hope you all love it as much as I do. haha**

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Fili and Kili walked over to one of the many corners that the big place had. But in this corner was a big curved red sofa with gold trim. Fili smiled as he jumped on it and laid out stretching his legs looking up at his brother who looked unsure. "This is way comfy. Have a seat." Fili sat back up giving the sofa a pat next to him.

Kili gave his brother a fake smile as he took a seat next to him. This place was making him uncomfortable but it seemed like Fili was enjoying himself. The only thing Kili liked about this place was the lights. The dancing half naked girls that kept jumping on top of the tables made his cheeks flush. He also thought that the place was well over packed and this party made the ones he and his brother went to look like nothing. And he now had the memory of someone grabbing his back side burned into his head. It was scary since he never saw his attacker and his brother kept teasing him about it being a man who had grabbed him. Everything looked smaller now that he was human sized.

"What's the matter Kili?" The way his brother was acting was making Fili feel bad, it seemed right now that it was a bad idea that Rebecca brought them all here. He had no idea where his uncle was or Gandalf.

Kili looked over at his brother unsure. "This place is huge." He was momentarily blinded as a bright red flashing light danced over the sofa they were sitting at. Kili blinked looking up at the ceiling seeing red dots dance across his vision. He looked back down looking at the people who were dancing and he noticed a familiar figure dressed in thick gray baggy robes.

Kili elbowed his brother. "Look."

Fili's eyes followed to where his brother was looking and the sight made his blood run cold. "Is that…Gandalf?"

In the over packed crowd of dancing people was the gray haired wizard. He had his hands up in the air waving them around while his feet tapped against the ground. He would jump in the air every so often as his head moved from side to side. They could both hear him shouting in the air. He was shouting some strange words neither of them knew with some Whoopee's and some Turn it up! They watched as one of the girls who was around him brushed up against the older man. The wizard looked unfazed as he kept his beat with his feet.

It was a strange and awkward thing to see the wizard laughing and looking like he was having fun.

"I think I will have one of those drinks Rebecca told us about." Fili got up looking back down at his younger brother. "Don't go anywhere. It looks unsafe." He told him smiling as he walked away.

"Then why are you leaving?" He asked but his brother was already walking over to the tall table with endless amount of bottles behind it. He had forgotten what the name for it was. He looked around at all the people who were dancing, the lights shining down on them making their faces change to the color of the lights.

He was so deep in thought that he hadn't noticed that someone had taken a seat next to him until he felt the sofas cushion move. He turned his head thinking that his brother had made his way back but it was not Fili.

"Hello there handsome." Said a dark haired young woman with thick blond streaks in her hair. She had on a small green top that was a few sizes too small and it made her bust stick out over the top. She had a short bright pink mini skirt on that revealed her knee high black stocking's.

"Umm." He didn't know what to say as he looked her up and down making his cheeks flush just as they had earlier making him look away.

"Aww…so cute, a shy one." She reached over to him grabbing the side of his cheek making him look at her. "Wanna come home with me?"

Kili frowned. "You have no one to walk you home?" He asked. He knew from what he was told that it was unsafe for girls to walk home alone after dark. Will had told him about how some men were complete creeps now a days. He felt sorry for the girl.

Her hand slipped from his cheek the tips or her finger nails running down the front of his shirt scratching at his chest. "Do you have chest hair hun?" She reached her other hand out grabbing at the bottom of his shirt slowly lifting it up.

Kili grabbed her hand. "Please don't do that." He looked around hoping for his brother to come back, or anyone he knew for that matter. This girl was making him uncomfortable.

She got up from the couch swinging her legs over Kili's legs sitting on his lap. "You seem young…" She said running her hand though his hair then pulling away looking down at her hand. "Your hairs a little greasy." She looked disgusted but then grabbed his upper arm. "Did you just come from a workout?" Her green eyes looked hopeful as she squeezed his arm. "For one so young looking you sure have some nice arms." She ran her hand up his neck pulling his hair back. She bent over sniffing his neck just before she took a bite.

"Ow!" Kili shouted pulling away from her his hand coming up to his neck. "You bit me!" He looked at her in disbelief.

"It's supposed to be a turn on Hun." She said her face coming at his neck once more. "I'm so Horny." She started to kiss his neck.

He grabbed her waist and pushed her back looking up at her. "Well if you're hungry there's supposed to be food over in that other corner across the way." Kili said not knowing what she had actually said.

She looked at him her eyebrows moving inward like she was mad. "What are you retarded or something?" She asked smiling once again. "That's ok, I'll teach ya all you need to know." She said being moving closer to his face nibbling on his ear as she wrapped her legs around his back.

He squirmed underneath her his face scrunching up.

Someone behind them cleared their throat making her stop what she was doing and turn around, her green eyes light up as she looked him up and down. "Wow! I don't know what it is with men with long hair today but they only getting better." She scooted herself off Kili and took a step toward the new man in her sights, running her hand down his chest her hand sticking to the black leather. "Ummm…You know every girl loves a bad boy in leather." She looked up at the man who was much taller than herself. Her legs getting weak as her whole body melted as she looked into his crystal blue eyes.

"Excuse me." He said brushing her hand off him and walking past her with a serious look on his face. "We have to go Kili."

"Kili?" She said looking back to the man who was still sitting on the couch. "You know him?" She asked but not getting an answer she put the pieces together herself. "He's your son!"

Thorin ignored her as he looked around. "Where's Fili?"

"He went to get something to drink. What's wrong?" Kili asked as he pushed himself up off the couch standing in front of his uncle.

"Go get him." He demanded. "I'll tell you when we get out of here."

Kili went off in the direction he knew his brother went.

"You need to stop having such a tight leash on your boy. You've caused him to be stupid, he knows nothing about having fun or about girls." She said disappointment in her voice. "How about yourself my sexy dark mysterious man?" She asked of the dark haired man the young boy long forgotten behind her. "I bet I wouldn't even have ta teach you a thing, if anything you'll be teaching me."

He looked down at her his face changing to a small smirk. "Your mother let you leave the house like that?" He remembered Will saying that to a girl when they first came to this lighted place.

Her face changed from a high look to a pout. "Excuse me?!" She yelled placing her hands on her hips.

Thorin turned smiling as he saw his two nephews walking up to him.

The girl took in the looks of the blond haired man. "Now that's my type! Come to mama sexy!" She yelled as she started to walk over to Fili but Thorin grabbed her arm. "Get your hands off me Mr. Gloomy no fun."

Thorin looked down at her. "What did you call me?" He looked at her confused not knowing what she was talking about.

"You heard me old man..." She looked up at his handsome face. "Sexy old man." She whispered reaching her hand up running her hand across his scruffy face. "I like a man with a loonngg ruff scruff." She said in a purring tone as she moved her hips from side to side. "I could take all three of yawl home….and you could be the main course Hun."

Thorin shook his head at the girl. "I don't play games."

"Ohhh but I do…Do you like S and M?" She asked reaching behind Thorin with both hands and grabbing ahold of his back cheeks giving them a tight squeeze. "Nice and tight."

Thorin's eyes went wide not expecting the young girl to grab him in such a way. He reached behind his back grabbing her hands and pulling them away from him. "Please don't touch me like that again." He told her in a low voice.

"Macho and yet shy, I like that."

Thorin pushed past her looking around for his nephews who weren't where they were a little bit ago. "Hum."

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:D Sorry to make Kili so stupid but it had to be done to make this funny. Hopefully no one was OOC. And I've never been to a real party so hopefully it was well don't. So if you liked it as much as me **please review**

**The next chapter will contain drug use...not anyone we like...not untentional that is. :P So sorry if that will offend anyone. But you know how party's go.**


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